My Debate

When I started this blog I had no intention of naming names, but my own. Now I may never have a single person that reads this blog, but what if... My family and friends are apart of this against their knowledge. This is my diary of sorts. Though they are important factors do I really need to throw them out there into the blog world?

My favorite blog is Heather Armstrong's DOOCE. She talks about her family and friends openly and honestly...or so we are led to believe that.

So my resolve to this matter is to rename my family....either using their middle names or nicknames instead of their real names. Yikes. If it ever comes to where I want to name them as they should be....I will make that change.

Sick Day

I went home from work yesterday sick.

I left at 3:30, so it was only an hour and a half early.

All day I felt PREGNANT! But I'm not! I was just nauseated and wanted to puke.

When I finally had enough, I decided to go home early. Remember when you got to go home sick, and actually go to bed? That went out the door two years ago when a little "responsibility" came into the world. I had to pick my daughter up at daycare before going home. As we pulled onto our street my husband was pulling out of the garage. He was going into work and won't be home until after 10pm. Ugh!

I tried to get my daughter to lie down for a short nap, so I could just close my eyes for a few minutes. From her room I could hear, "Mamma! Out! Mamma No Nap!" After about 10 minutes I brought her into my bed, turned on Finding Nemo and took in a cat-nap or two.

My biggest fear when needing to call in sick, or go home sick is my husband. I know I'm not the only woman out there where their husband doesn't understand a thing when you're sick. I have to give him kudos though, he was very good yesterday...but that is not normal! Normally I get the sigh of disappointment. When he's really irritated by me he'll go into a rant on how he works when he's sick...blah blah blah! So when I decided to leave work yesterday I prepared myself. The entire drive home, when I wasn't thinking about pulling over to puke, I was building up my speech. It would say that it's his own fault he chooses to work when he's sick.... Then I didn't need my speech! When I'm prepared he's nice, and when I'm not he'll catch me off guard!

That takes me to another interesting fact about my husband...his cleaning abilities. Yesterday he stayed home from his part-time job to clean the house. Our house is only messy because WE LIVE THERE! When we finish our basement we'll have twice as much room, therefore we won't be so crammed for space. We're constantly picking up toys and whatever the dog has chosen to bring out of our bedroom (i.e. my underwear, my bra, a pair of boxers, etc.). When I talked to my husband he informed me that he cleaned our bedroom, the master bathroom, the kitchen and living room. He gets a big thumbs up for the living room and the bedroom, but the other two rooms illustrate exactly what I mean.

THE KITCHEN: From a glance there's nothing to be seen on the counters, well except for crumbs and some sticky "whatever." Once you actually walk into the kitchen you then notice that the little counter space between the refrigerator and the pantry is stacked high with papers. Whatever had previously made itself home on the other counters were now moved to this 2' x 1' space! Then when you actually look at the table, it’s just as nasty as it was when I left in the morning. Our daughter's sticky handprints all over the place. If you were to set your elbows (naughty!) on the table, they'd surly stick!

THE BATHROOM: I will admit, I am a slob when it comes to the bathroom. I leave stuff sitting out that could easily put in their proper place. Yesterday when I got home, the counter was completely empty and wiped down. Where did everything go? In my bank of drawers. We each have one small drawer and two deep drawers for all of our stuff. One of his big drawers is actually mine too because he didn't need it. He threw everything into the first two drawers. When I say everything I mean e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. This morning I was getting ready I found a sippy cup with apple juice in my drawer! So that image of him taking his arm and simply sweeping everything into the drawer was realized!
Now is it just me or does cleaning the bathroom have more to do with actually cleaning, or hiding everything? When cleaning I would expect the toilet to be scrubbed, the shower at least wiped down, and the mirrors cleaned. None of these were done. Can you say, SURFACE CLEANER!

Day off!

I took the day off on Friday! It was the best day to not be sitting in a freezing cold office!

My husband and I took our daughter to daycare and took our boat out on the lake (bad parents!). It's just no fun for me to take her with on the boat. While my husband drives, I have to keep her from going overboard. I just wanted to sit there and do nothing but enjoy the day.

We always drive around and dream. This particular lake has some very expensive properties on it, so we like to see what has been torn down and what has gone up. Our favorite spot on the lake was torn down last fall, and is now home to a monstrous construction site. The house going in looks awesome, but still makes us sad that the old one is gone. It was such a cute house, with a wrap-around porch. All the way around the porch were outdoor ceiling fans. It looked like the perfect place to take a nap. That's certainly our stipulation to any home on the lake. If I'm going to pay the taxes, I'm going to enjoy every bit of that house! I want to be able to nap on my porch with drink in hand!

My husband and I had a really nice time together. We actually sat there and talked like adults do. There were no phones ringing, no dogs terrorizing the child, and no child begging to be picked up. For the first time since the birth of our daughter, two years, we had down time together.

There were moments that I wanted to smack my husband though. Like all men, I'm sure, he was taking this moment is as a time to get a piece. I didn't want to start a fight, so I bit my tongue and dealt with it calmly. I wanted to say "Grow Up! We're having a nice time together and all you can think about it is getting laid!" Instead I said, "Why does this have to be about getting a piece? Can't we just have a nice time together?" He replied by saying that he was having a good time and that would make it even better! With a large frustrated sigh I said, "For you, not for me. I just want to spend time together. This is so nice, don't ruin it." End of discussion. Again I'm the bad guy, but come on! We get a couple hours together and that's all you can think about!?! I shouldn't have to point out that we were on the lake in full view of passer-bys and people on shore. No the lake wasn't really busy, but busy enough for my taste!

In the end, I ended up with a nice tan and he's lobster red. His one-track mind kept him from thinking to put on sunscreen onto his Scandinavian skin!

Happy Birthday...and Bub-bye 20's

Today is my 29th birthday. I'm happy nor sad about the day. The only thought running through my mind is that I only have one year left of my 20's...shouldn't I be sad? Your 20's are supposed to be your carefree days, or do I have that mixed up with your college years?

When I look at all that's happened in the last year, I'm very pleased. We moved out of apartment living and into our own house. We built a house in a small town near my hometown. It's only about 25 minutes away from where we had been living for the last 6+ years. The new town is a small town and my husband grew up in the suburbs. This is a new experience for him. I on the other hand had vowed to never return to small town life...but here I am. In the first week or two that we lived in our new house, my husband went to the local drug store. He came home laughing because they were playing polka music in the store. He couldn't get over it and told everyone he knew.
Now that warm weather is upon us I'm being to remember the nice things about living in a small town. There are always kids playing in their yards and even in the streets. The kids can play without constant parental supervision because the neighborhood is so close knit. We go for walks and everyone says hi and asks how old our black lab puppy is. They don't care if your dog goes pee on your lawn, because later in the day their dog will be doing the same on your lawn. When we're at the park other parents strike up conversation with you! I guess I can deal with this small town living after all.

Since moving into our new house we've had some financial ups and downs. Namely, money gets tight my husband gets a nervous twitch. We've been paying off some of our old debt, and in turn tightening up our cash flow. This kills him because he's a compulsive shopper. Yes, I said that "HE" is the shopper! I hate malls and stores and only go when I need to. He could spend hours inside Target or Best Buy. Me, I just want to get to the exit as fast as possible. Especially when I have a two year old in tow.

My husband asked me what I wanted for my birthday...and I debated on what to say. Really, I don't want anything...I need some stuff, but want is such an unpredictable word. I want a car that was made AFTER I graduated from high school, but would prefer that it be AFTER I graduated from college. I'd like a massage, but need a few extra hours of sleep. I'd like to have a girls night out, but could settle on a movie night in.
When I said I didn't want anything for Mother's Day, that's what I got. He did give me three cards: one from him, my daughter, and the dog. I got what I asked for though so I can't complain. So with that, I didn't say what I wanted but told him to think of things that I need.

Life and Death

Yesterday on my way home from the office I managed to beat death by a mere millimeter or two...and I'm not exaggerating! I was following behind a dump truck where the driver thought I should be able to read his mind on his intentions.

At this point either my professional driving skills or luck kicked in because there is no logical reason why I'm here today to tell the story.

The driver of the gigantic dump truck decided that he had the right of way of the entire road. Just as the construction area ended the lanes broke from one to two and a turning lane. He gunned it to the left and I kept going straight. There was obviously some kind of communication error between his vibes and mine because all of the sudden he gunned it for the right...right into me. There was no way out of it. Before I knew it his bumper was headed for my side window, otherwise known as MY HEAD. This is when my ability to maneuver a car around any obstacle came into play. Somehow I managed to slam on the gas, get up on the curb and get past him. We never touched, though there's no way to explain it.
As I watched in my rear-view mirror he sat there for a second, obviously yelling to himself about those damn women drivers. Then he turned his truck back to the left side of the road. He was basically taking an extended WIDE TURN.
He didn't signal, he didn't even slow down- that would have warning enough for me!

As I kept on down the road I was amazed at my composure. I wasn't shaking or even out of breath, I was simply going over what just happened to try and understand it.

Here we go again...

I can never get myself to keep up with a blog. I love reading them, and think about all the things I would post, but when it comes down to it I can't stick with it.

I'm a big fan of DOOCE and could only wish to aspire to her greatness!

I just want to take from what I've read from Heather and give myself something to look back onto. I love her monthly newsletters to Leta, and would love to do the same.

I will once again try to stick it out. I will write at least once a week. Nothing whitty required. I just want to document the days and my daughter's progression. I want to remember the little details some day!


So here goes...